What are a Mistresses responsibilities and other musings

It is with some surprise that I find that I have taken so long to update my blog; my two followers must be beside themselves! lol

Christmas seems a long time ago, unfortunately when finally the mistletoe and mince pies vanished my belly had grown and it’s taking rather a long time to retreat.  The diet starts tomorrow, honest.

It was over the Christmas period that I took on a replacement for the poor chap who died last year.  My way of recruiting has never been the normal way, I have found in the past the ridicules convention of having someone come to the Office, sit down for about ½ an hour and answer a lot questions that I can predict the answers too before they attend to be a mind-numbingly stupid way of recruiting.  What do you really learn, they can dress appropriately, have two arms and legs and will tell you their hobbies are reading, Facebook and going to the cinema.  So the guy I took on I met in my local by chance, we were both five sheets to the wind, he knew that I had lost an Engineer, what he did not know was that I was willing to look at someone without the correct training/knowledge.  We burbled away for ten minutes or so before I came to my senses and said we were both too inebriated to have a sensible conversation.  I suggested we met up in a couple of days’ time in the pub for a drink and a chat.  Strangely enough I had had this guy in my mind for about a week before we bumped into each other; I just had had no way of contacting him.  The meeting was relaxed, comfortable and honest.  He doesn’t go on Facebook by the way.  So he has been with me for about three weeks now and I can see he’s going to make it.  Another one converted to the dark side!

Regarding the other dark side, Mistress and I are getting on long with life in that plod plod along way that most couples do.  In our case a little different from much of the planet.  We’ve been to Devotions again, where during a play in a secluded area we were disturbed by some gobby, charmless nerd who tried to hold Mistress in a conversation while She was shall we say busy.

Number One Daughter is now close to giving birth and has finally bloomed, it seems to be clear that She is apparently moving towards being a Mistress to Her partner, the orders and commands to him are clearer and he checks with Her more often.  Also Mistress borrowed Her Tablet the other day and notices that three windows were minimized, all on BDSM, one of which was How to be a better Mistress!  Excellent!

In the blogs I read there seems to be a lot of chatter about BDSM and FLR/FLM.  The view seems to be that in a FLR/FLM there doesn’t have to be any BDSM.  I find that very hard to agree with.  The main point to me in our FLR/FLM relationship is that I submit to my Wife and Mistress.  My submission takes the form of obedience, love and commitment.  Love of course being the most important.

I’m not perfect and I get things wrong, then I expect to be punished, this is one of the most important parts of being a Mistress.  If Mistress cannot punish can She be a real Mistress? 

This doesn’t mean that the punishment has to be physical, although in my case it tends to work.  It can be loss of privileges or Mistress refusing to be Mistress, that really scary for a sub man.  I feel that as a submissive to my Wife; I need, not want, but need Her to discipline me.  I also am now a firm believer in Maintenance Spankings.  They don’t reduce me to tears, well not yet anyway; they do however reinforce the Mistress/slave relationship, binding us closer together.  In regards to the rest of our BDSM life that is I think optional and does not have to exist in a FLM/FLR relationship.  In our case the BDSM side is important.  Take the other day I was put in leg spreaders, pulled over Mistresses lap, hands secured behind my back and spanked, and I mean spanked, I lost count after 500.  I hollered, twisted and ended up begging, by the end of it I was in a complete state of very happy submission.  I was then immediately pulled into bed and pounced upon, take, owned, consumed.  I could go on about the nipple twisting and biting, the hand on my throat, the hair pulling, the look in Her eyes, the power, and of course the mind blowing intensity of it all, I shall try and resist though.  Just typing this sets me off drifting with thoughts of submission and loving devotion.  I’m so lucky.

Sorry if this sounds like I’m bragging, it’s hard not to when you’re so proud of your owner.

I guess the point I am trying to make to any Mistress out there is that a submissive needs to be loved, owned and dominated.  As a man physical domination is important to me.  If you think I am wrong just ask you boy once he has had a couple of drinks.

I fully realize that this is not natural for most Women, although I suspect for the younger generations this may not be as true.  I guess for a Married Lady the thought of hitting your husband must be unsettling, disturbing and goes against all you have held dear.  I can only suggest you think about what it can bring to your relationship, what it can take away and do the maths. Clearly if you cannot bring yourself to physically punish you boy please consider other options, but don’t just ignore the need or your relationship will suffer, if it hasn’t already.  Remember for him it’s a need not a want.  If you were lucky enough to have a boy child who turned out gay, would, could (and yes you should) accept his need.  The problem with FLR/FLM is that I feel so many men have this need and so many Women cannot accept it.  Oh and if you enjoy using a crop or cane etc, embrace it and learn to control your feeling, being a Mistress is all about control for You and your boy.

With control and discipline comes an awful responsibility. I have never thought being a Mistress is easy, You take on a heavy but rewarding role.

On a personnel level I fully accept that in many ways my life would have been easier if I hadn’t been submissive.  As I’ve accepted my need since I was a teen I have found it easier to accept than possibly many.

If this has turned into a rant, sorry.

Moving on, I have been writing a book over the last few weeks, I have now completed chapter 14.  Unfortunately my writing skills i.e. spelling and grammar are poor, due in no small part to the kind old lady teacher who use to draw blood on my left hand with a ruler

when I was a young child. I of course grew up in the era when being left handed was the sign of the devil.  I still literally have the scars.   Anyway Mistress has agreed to give it the once over and I’m going to post the first 5 chapters.  After that I may not post the rest unless at least one person comments and says they want to read more.  No pressure lol.

The book is a Femdom part thriller, part horror romp and to be honest I have never read anything like it, which does not bode well for it.  As they say everyone’s got a book in them, just most of them are tomorrows fire lighters.

Have a great week and remember the whips and chains cannot hurt you; it’s the Woman at the other end if your very lucky.

m