Chains and pink nighties

It's been back to work today after my weeks rest, the horrible heavy thud feeling I get as I climb into the car to leave home is awful. Once I get into the office I don't have time to dwell, I plunge into the turmoil and stress that earns the beer tokens.

My first call out of the office was to a house to do some electrical work.  It was mid morning and I had the apprentice with me, straight out of school, keen as a young pup to engage and please.  If he had a tail it would wag all the time.  On knocking a scruffy; smelly early middle aged man answered, he looked confused to see us, shouting into the home he yelled at his wife/partner who screeched back telling him to let us in.  We entered into a stinky, grotty hovel. The feature wallpapered wall was ripped and faded, stained with tobacco, splatters of what appeared to be food and what I thought was possibly stale vomit. The carpet was sticky, sort of yellow with the texture of cress and harsh sandpaper.  Two council dogs growled from behind a baby gate in the kitchen.  The Lady of the home was still in Her short, once pink, stained night dress.  It was straining at the seams due to the larger than life gut that now challenged my progress. Huge saggy breasts almost peaked out of the bottom of the garment.

She remembered that we were due to come today and made a half hearted apology for the state of the home.  Apparently Tuesday is her cleaning day!, honest!. The dogs were dragged snapping past us and hauled upstairs.  This then just left the Rabbit sitting in the far corner of the lounge, twitching its nose, there was the odd dropping lying nearby.

We got on with the job.  Kindly we were offered a Tea, after seeing the state of the kitchen  we politely declined.  The job was easy and the Trainee was able to do it with limited supervision.  At one stage we had to turn the power off, I called up the stairs to let them know, just incase they were on a P C and needed to log off.  She came to the top of the stairs, STILL IN THE NIGHTY!!, it was really short. OMG there are something's no-one should see, I quickly looked down and retreated into the lounge.

Telling the lad to get a shift on I turned round to see She had entered the lounge and had slumped into the brown old leather sofa, sitting with Her legs wide open; sucking on a king size cigarette, smoke flowing out of nose and mouth.  She engaged me in conversation, well it was more shouting than talking, apparently I was her mate.  I must have been, every sentence ended with "You know what I mean mate!".

She kept a close eye on the lad, almost licking Her bright lipsticked lips.  Reaching down to scratch Her thigh She past wind loudly and giggled. Nice!

We left as soon as possible, as we got into the car I said to my Gofa   "if you ever piss me off I will bring you here and leave you naked; chained up in Her Bedroom!"  He laughed nervously asking where the chains were coming from!

I have no idea I replied........
m