Monday pee

Like most people i know, Monday's are not the best days in my life.  Just getting over the weekend, you know that time for fun and play!.  Monday's are all about work and drudge.

However this Monday has been slightly better than usual.  This evening Mistress went out with a girl friend and I was required to tag along.  You know, Drive, Open Doors, Pull Chairs, Get Drinks etc, no problem I enjoy all this stuff, Her friend is OK, She doesn't really know what we are into; but She enjoys the attention.
I like Her a lot, She is down to earth and has a deep dirty laugh that is infectious.

Unfortunately they chose to go to a Carvery.  Just in case you are not from a Country that has this special, mouthwatering, guess what it is mush, i will try and describe how it works.

1. You put out a load of cheap, poorly cooked food in a row on a bar.  Some meat, some vegetables  and other things (not always sure what they are, they look vaguely familiar) Yorkshire Puddings and Stuffing Balls possibly.  Funny how they both taste the same.

2. Then you bombard the "food" with light and heat for a few hours.

3.  You then allow Children and Adults (also Children) to queue up and pile as much as they can on the slightly grubby smaller than normal plates.  Some of the Children/Adults like to use their hands.  Some of the Children/Adults have just had a pee.Yes you've guessed correctly some did not wash their hands.  I know; unbelievable.

4.  Then its your turn, MMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

The food is the taste and consistency of Cardboard, Baby Food and Solidified Fat/Oil.

So a quality venue, this was not, but cheap, so very popular.

Anyway i got the drinks, Mistress wanted a G & T, there was no tonic available (honest) so She had to have a Bitter Lemon with the Gin instead.  Her friend wanted a J2o, yes hard to believe, no J2o's, well it was Monday i suppose, so She went for a different soft drink.  I had the Diet Coke, fairly safe with that.

We then queued up and piled our plates high.  I don't ever go for the Roast Potatoes, hard oily objects; guarantied to disappoint.

After settling the Ladies i relaxed and tried to enjoy the meal, the benefit of there being only two Ladies present is that to some extent i can switch off while they talk, i like most men have the useful ability to be able to let Women chat and gossip with the skill of nodding and grunting in agreement at the right times.

This allows me to do one of my favourite pass times when i have a few minutes "people watching"

Its interesting watching other people, there was a family out with Grandpa.  The Mother was a little overweight, tall, a blond with heels that were too high for her.  She walked with a stoop to compensate, this forced her to be hunched, the hunch remained even when sitting so she consumed her food looking down at her plate, occasionally looking up with effort so to join in with the conversation.

The men seemed to do most of the talking, there were three children, two girls and a teenage boy who looked sullen and bored.  The two girls were texting and both seemed more interested in their phones than the food.

To my right was a Son and Mother, the Son was clearly taking the Mother out for a meal, they arrived after us, but left long before we had finished eating.  Guess that's his duty over for a bit.  In fact i'm not sure either enjoyed the outing.  Possibly both do it out of a sense of duty to each other.  I understand that, we have all a sense of duties and responsibilities to others. They didn't seem to talk much.

Funny how all the Staff were foreign, polite and friendly, the Chef called Mistress Sweetie!

So after some bland very hot coffee we left.

The price was low, the quality lower and the possibility that i was not the only one tasting pee priceless!

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